Q&A With Author Of 'See Me Rolling' Lottie Jackson

For this week's Informer, we spent some time with Lottie Jackson who was up until recently Fashion Roundtable's newsletter editor. Now Lottie has published her first book with Penguin and we couldn't be prouder. See Me Rolling is a playful, illuminating memoir, but it is also a clarion call for greater diversity and inclusion. Lottie powerfully explores the ways in which we undervalue and underrepresent disabled people in our society, and demonstrates how negative stigmas about 'abnormal' bodies seep into all aspects our lives, from travel, work and education, to fashion and social media. In this dazzling debut, Lottie reveals why we must strive for change and redefine what it means to be disabled in every facet of life. She has a voice that needs to be heard.

How did the concept of the book come about?

I began writing See Me Rolling at the start of the pandemic, in the midst of a lockdown. I saw this unprecedented global event as a ‘reset’ moment – one that could heighten our awareness of the social inequalities and misconceptions affecting the UK’s 13.9 million disabled people. Using my first-hand experiences, I set out to communicate both the injustices and untold joys of disability. To start, I broke this down into several key areas – asking, can we redefine our philosophy of beauty, freedom, identity, education, productivity, love and desire in a culture that demands physical perfection?

What emerged, however, was something entirely unexpected – and life-affirming. For me, it completely changed not only how I view the world, but also myself. I realised that there is not enough space for individuals to talk about their experiences of being disabled. It feels incredibly private and shameful and as if no one else is speaking about it – so the cycle perpetuates. I want this book to change the game, to prove that disability is a source of inner strength, never shame.

What made you want to tell this particular story?

I have always believed that one of the biggest injustices facing disabled people is a lack of confidence about how to approach disability – in fact, 45 per cent of the British public do not even feel comfortable saying the word ‘disabled’. By bringing a playful, positive, warm and witty voice to my book, I wanted to capture the nuances of disability and challenge reader’s preconceptions of what it means to be disabled.

Initially, I was working on the book as part of my application to Penguin’s WriteNow mentorship scheme which eventually led to a book deal. What started as 1,000 words has grown and evolved into See Me Rolling.

As this book is based on your own experiences, what was the most challenging part of writing this book and how did you overcome it?

Writing about myself, my disability and making sense of my experiences was, without a doubt, the most emotionally demanding – but life-changing – part of the process. This requires you to continually put yourself into quite a painful and self-interrogating headspace. To my mind, it’s not possible to ‘overcome’ this challenge. It still felt as demanding on the last page as it did laying down the first few lines… but I think the more confident and familiar you become inside that feeling of discomfort, the writing starts to feel more possible. In a sense, you develop a road map for how to navigate around and translate your thoughts and ideas into something tangible. I think reading back over what I had already created and getting feedback from my literary editor, told me that I was on the right track – I had to trust my instincts, push through it and keep persevering.

I suppose, on a literal level, music and creating playlists really helped me during the writing process. Having previously never been able to write with any background noise, I got into listening to music as I wrote. For me, it was an attempt to quickly tap into a depth of emotion that isn’t always readily available to you at 9am on a Monday morning.

How did publishing your first book affect your process of writing? What surprised you the most?

See Me Rolling toggles between a range of literary styles. There’s the more journalistic prose and analytical side of my writing. But it also contains enormous amounts of comedic anecdotes, descriptive passages and philosophical musings to really pull in the reader. Balancing all of this was a challenge and a massive learning experience, but looking at the finished book, I believe this variety is where its impact lies.

Additionally, I think coming from a journalistic background where articles are typically around 800-1200 words, it was interesting to plumb much deeper into a subject and really explore its key issues from a range of different angles. In long form, aspects like pacing, flow and clarifying overarching arguments were always a consideration – and a constant bugbear if I’m honest.

Drawing from your first-hand experiences, you sculpt a new space to share your vision for disability, full of nuance, humour and heady possibilities. How does your book jump-start this conversation around greater diversity and inclusion?

See Me Rolling is not only a memoir, it’s something of a manifesto for change. Disabled people are more than twice as likely to live in food poverty, be unemployed or experience domestic abuse and they are chronically underrepresented in the workforce, in higher education and in the media. This is unacceptable. Throughout the book, I demonstrate why we need to examine the ways we undervalue disabled people, as well as tackle the negative perceptions that beset people with disabilities.

I think it’s an injustice that so many of today’s urgent conversations exclude people with disabilities — whether that’s in terms of our education system, MeToo, wellness trends, fashion and beauty ideals, productivity, social media, sex and relationships… In my book, I have tried to address this oversight and raise original, unexpected points of view.

Thematically speaking, were there any themes in the book that you particularly enjoyed exploring?

Throughout See Me Rolling, I use humour to break down some of the awkwardness and stigma that has clouded our view of disability. This was definitely my favourite part of the writing process — there was a lot of room for experimentation, hilarity and joyfulness. It’s fair to say, I was chuckling to myself while typing away at my laptop.

What do you hope readers will take away from the book?

Most of all, I want readers to thoroughly enjoy the experience, to come away feeling enlightened and optimistic about disability. I think the term ‘inspire’ can be quite contentious when it comes to disability narratives – but there’s no denying that I want to inspire readers to expand their ideas of what a body should be and cast off our cultural obsession with being ‘normal’.

What does the title reference?

The title has various meanings and can be interpreted however you like. But to me, See Me Rolling invokes ideas of perseverance and playfulness, while encouraging readers to see new ways of existence that lie outside of able-bodied norms. It does have a cute origin story which is revealed in one of the essays – so you’ll have to read it to find out!

Your book will be published in hardback, e-book and audio on 1st June. What more can we expect from you in the future?

It’s back to my day job in fashion journalism. Beyond this, I would also love to get into comedy screenwriting. I like how humour can be politically subversive, provocative and make us question social expectations — writers like Laurie Nunn, Lucy Prebble and Phoebe Waller-Bridge are very inspiring to me, in this respect.

What does literary success look like to you?

While I was writing See Me Rolling, I was focused on the idea that success would be all about social and political action – in other words, I wanted my book to eradicate our negative perception of disability. It was my hope that, by changing readers’ attitudes, this would go some way to eliminating real world inequality. My ambitions were high — but now, approaching publication, I think if this book can change a small number of people’s minds and spark new conversations, it will be a success in my eyes.

 
You can pre-order Lottie’s book, by following this link